Pins and Needles
by FacinelliFan882639s
Summary: When Carlisle sees Esme- a blast from the past- after she's hurt him, after he's just started to become whole again...How will he react? 'Emo' Carlisle and Esme, sex scenes, Carlisle rape. It's not really as sexual as it sounds, but there are sex scenes.
1. Chapter 1

Carlisle's POV

I heard my daughter stirring around at her normal time. Eight o'clock, sharp. How she had got THAT one down, I don't know. I sat up, though, and glanced in the mirror. My hair was....wow....I'd...never seen anything like THAT before....I jumped in the shower, cursing. turn the water on. wait five minutes. THEN get it. Whoops.  
I got a shower as quickly as I could, and hastily dried and styled my hair. "Daddy, You look handsome." I chuckled and scooped her up into my arms. She was the joy of my life. Ever since Scarlett had divorced me, we were much happier, too. No more abuse for me, no more hatred toward her. "I haven't even put my piercings in yet, honey."  
"I know....I wish you'd hold up on your promise, daddy...."  
"Honey...I know...I....I just...."  
"It's ok, Daddy..." I sighed. "Ready to go to school...?"  
Alice nodded and scampered to get ready. When she was, I loaded her into the car and drove like a maniac to the preschool. Some idiot in a toyota cut me off, and i screeched, slamming on the brakes. "FUCK!"  
Alice giggled. "Daddy!"  
"Don't you DARE repeat that, Alice."  
"Ok." We drove to the preschool, and I gently picked her up out of her seat and planted her on the ground while I fixed the seatbelt. When I turned around again, I almost screamed in shock. Esme Platt a girl from the college I had dropped out of, walking into the preschool with a little blonde, curly haired boy. She looked really different, though. She had long light brown hair, but it was short on top and teased up, and she had two neon blue and black 'coon's tails' on the long parts. She had a stud in her nose, her cartlige pierced, and a monroe piercing. Damn....she was HOT.....but, then I remembered all the pain she had put me through, and I lost allinterest.

Esme's POV

When I was walking Jasper into school, I saw Carlisle Cullen. Boy, was HE a blast from the past, but man, had he changed. He had a ducktail haircut, his hair dyed almost white with a big neon blue streak. He also had an eyebrow piercing, a nostril piercing, snakebites, gauges, his chartlige pierced, and god knows what else...He had to work at a tattoo and piercing parlor or something like that, but still....he was hot.... Even though he was skiny, you could see his mucles; and the way they rippled down his arms? ooh, baby...I really regretted all the hurt I'd put him through...Teasing him, and then when he admitted he liked me, fucking him senseless and running away, starting cruel rumors about him, which led to a lot of hard times for him, as I had found out years before...I caught a glimpse of one of his tattoos. It was a name...probably his wife's... He was so hot, though...

Carlisle's POV

I walked Alice in, trying not to look back at Esme. I couldn't believe I hadn't seen her before, but it was even worse that I HAD seen her. I leaned over the fence, just enjoying the nice breeze that wafted by, watching the kids play.  
"Hey. Long time no see. You sure got hot."  
I froze where I was standing and looked at her out of the corner of my eye.  
"Yeah...You've really changed, Cullen. Last time I saw you you were cute, though, too."  
"You've changed yourself, Esme." I hissed.  
She sighed. "Look, Carlisle. I know I hurt you, but.."  
"Hurt doesn't cover it. Broken. Shattered. Ripped apart. Maybe THAT shows you."  
"I'm sorry..."  
"You've said that before. It doesn't help. Not for what you did."  
"Carlisle..."  
"Oh, and I hope you'll be happy to know, that RUMOR that you spread around about me that lead to me getting raped, is now true." I raised my eyebrows, smirking triumphantly, turned on my heel, and walked back to my car.  
"FUCK!" i stopped dead, and my eyes widened.  
"Looks like you taught your daugher a new word, too."  
"DOUCHE!"  
"...Looks like your son's in the same boat."  
"Yeah....he usually is..."  
we parted then, and I went straight to work. My cozy little tattoo parlor. Well, not MINE because I didn't own it, but it was my work.

DAMIEN'S POV My gorgeous boyfriend walked through the door, and I just about moaned. He was so. Sexy. His almost white hair reflected the sun perfectly, and his boots clicked against the floor tantalizingly. It seemed like he was walking in slow motion. I could almost hear Adam Lambert's 'Fever' playing in the background.

"There he goes, my baby walks so slow, SEXUAL tic-tac toe..."  
Mmm. He smirked sexily at me, seeing me start to drool.

CARLISLE'S POV "Hey, baby." My boyfriend, Damien wrapped a strong arm around my waist and kissed me.  
"Hey."  
"You're stressed, sweetheart. what's got you wound up?"  
"It's nothing. please-" He kissed and nibbled on my neck, and I felt his hands ghost up my back, under my shirt.  
"Never mind, then." He parted from me, and leaned away at arm's length. "W...what?" I blushed.  
"Nothing. Just looking at you." He smirked. "God, you're sexy."  
I chuckled. "You say that every day."  
"And I mean it, too." He smirked the way he did when I knew he was getting one of his crazy ideas. We'd been together for a few months, and I was getting used to them. "You know what you should get pierced next?"  
"What's that."  
"Your tongue. I like how it feels when I brush my tongue over one of your piercings, then I can make out with you AND feel it."  
"No, Damien. That's where I draw the line. No inner-oral piercings. Besides, I wouldn't be able to eat right for weeks..."  
"Hmm. That's right. And we don't need you any skinnier than you already are..." He ran his hands down my sides, and I shuddered. "139 pounds is too thin, Carlisle. Especially for your height."  
I was slightly hurt. My self-esteem was never high, and I had really taken a blow after I wasin an abusive marriage to Scarlett. Tears welled in my eyes. "Damien..."  
"I'm serious, Carlisle. I'm worried about you..."  
"Damien....to gain weight, I'd need to eat different food. I can't afford it. I barely have enough to feed Alice and I as it is, and she's a growing girl....Plus, if I DID gain weight, I'd have to buy all new clothes, and I definately don't have money for that. I need to clothe alice, too. Again, she's a growing girl. A...And what if I couldn't stop gaining....what if I just kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger-"  
Damien laughed. "You're worried about getting FAT? Carlisle, stop this. You worry way too much. I'm sorry I brought it up. You're perfect the way you are." He stroked my cheek gently with his hand cupped on my jaw, his thumb doing the stroking. I shivered. This was one of the reasons I loved Damien's company. He always knew the way to touch me. I closed my eyes, sighing contentedly.  
"Theeere." I felt his strong hands on my shoulders, roughly squeezing the muscles, but it felt good.  
"Mmmm~..."  
"Ready to get drawin' on skin?"  
"I guess." I smiled drowzily at him. "But I'd enjoy it more if I could just feel that for a few more minutes...all down my back..."  
"Are you asking for a back rub?"  
"Sure." I smiled.  
"Sit down." I obeyed, and he started roughly kneeding my back. His hands were at least the size of my head, and he was taller than me. Much taller. And bigger. To describe Damien in detail for you, he had dark, dark hair, cut almost the same way as mine, but a bit longer on all sides. He was at least 6'7", and he was built like a brick shit house. Seriously. He had many tattoos, only one of which I had done myself. I knew he could pick me up and throw me across the road if he wanted to, but I felt safe with him. He was a gentle giant, and he knew what I'd been through.  
Damien hit a sore spot, and I jumped, wincing. I guess I had pulled my back picking up Alice or something...  
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry...Shhhhh...It's okay. I didn't mean to hurt you, it's okay."  
My eyebrows knitted together in confusion, and I looked over my shoulder at him. "Huh?"  
"Carlisle, ever since you shut down that night, I don't want to do anything to upset you."  
"What night?" Though I remembered it all too clearly, I wanted to see how he described it.  
"That night we went out, and that guy was teasing you. You remember? He started getting really...sick with it, and then he started beating you up....You shut down for a week, just quivering whenever anyone came near you....It was awful to watch you go through that...You were so scared..." He shook his head sadly, remembering way too well what I was like when I was hit by someone.  
"Aw, Damy. It's okay. I was just scared then. I knew you didn't mean to hurt me." I took his hand. "I'm not scared. I knew you weren't being forceful." I smiled softly and took his hand.  
He returned the smile and kissed me gently. "Now get back to what you were doing. I feel better." I smirked.  
"You didn't tell me you were feeling BAD..."  
"My back hurt, but...Pleaaase?" I stared up at him innocently.  
He chuckled. "Alright." He paused for a minute. "Carlisle, are we ever going to have a physical relationship? I mean, we've made out and SEEN each other, but we've never....you know...."  
I sighed. "Damien. You're...very big....I...I don't know...." I blushed. "If I could handle you..."  
He chuckled. "I understand. And I'm not mad. You're right." He kissed my shoulder. "Perhaps we should wait. It might just get better. Now let me finish."  
I got back into the position I had been in before, and let him rub my back. 


	2. Chapter 2

On my lunch break, I went to get a haircut. My roots were getting out of control, and my blue streak was washing out. "Carlisle Cullen, 11:30."  
"Come on back." The voice startled me, and when I looked up, I found I was right in my suspicion. It was Esme.  
"You WORK here?" I said, my voice going up an octave.  
"Yeah. Come on back." She gently took my arm, leading me back to her station. "What're we doing today?" she was WAY too happy...  
"Just trimmed up and the roots done...."  
"The streak, too?" I nodded in response and sat down.  
"Do you get the back shaved or not?"  
"Yeah..." why I was so embarrassed about Esme cutting my hair, I don't know, but I was. Extremely.  
"So, what've you been up to the last what....13 years?"  
"Oh, you know. Getting abused, raped, shit like that." I said icily.  
She paused for a moment, taken off guard. "Who's name is that on your arm?"  
"My ex-wife. She beat the hell out of me every night, so I left her about....a year and a half ago. Alice and I have been much better off."  
"That's good...." "How about you?" "I married about a year after I left school. It took us a long time to get pregnant, but...I was abused, too....After I had Jasper...I just..left..."  
"Has that ben the only time you've been abused?"  
"Yeah...."  
"Hmm."  
She froze. "You mean it's not...for you...?"  
He scoffed. "No. Not at any rate."  
"O...oh...." She sighed. "Carlisle. I'm so sorry for what I did. It's the thing I regret most in my life. You were such a nice guy, and I ruined you. You're still a nice guy, but I can tell you've changed a lot since then, and not just in your looks..." she started slacking the bleach on my roots.  
...Perhaps I could accept her apology. She seemed sincere enough, and my life was O.K. right now, despite what she'd done. "...Thanks..."  
She spun me around in the chair and hugged me. Somehow, it felt so right, like we'd never been apart. I loved how she felt in my arms, and I squeezed her a bit more.  
I walked out of the salon, (I'm aware of how fruity that sounded, yes.) I smirked. Esme had done exactly what I wanted, AND she and I had gotten on a level plane. "Hey. Looks good, babe." Damien wrapped his arms around me. I smiled and lie my head on his chest. I heard the entry bell ring, and my eyes widened when I looked up. Was Esme FOLLOWING me?  
"Oh, hey, Carlisle. I didn't know you worked here."  
I blushed furiously. "U...uh...yeah....When can i do you? I MEAN..." See how flustered she got me? Damien laughed out loud, and Esme blushed. "What can I do for you?"  
"I want my son's name, Jasper, in black cursive with a rainbow behind it. Think you can manage that?" she smirked at me sexily. Damien was still laughing hysterically, doubled over. "I'm sure he can! Make sure he doesn't jump you! Or maybe he'll wait till later, since you didn't tell him when, yet!"  
"Shut up, Damien..." I looked down. It was just a stupid, playful remark, but, like I said before, I was really deficient in the self-esteem department, and it hurt...Tears streamed down my face before I could hold them back. I buried my face in my hands, hoping to hide it, then again, it probably wasn't the smartest move...call attention to what you want to hide? nah. not the best option, but I did it.  
"Carlisle...?" Esme looked at me, concerned when I peered through an opening between my fingers. "Huh? Oh, baby...I didn't mean...." he tried to wrap his arms around me, but I spun around, my back to him. "Come on, baby. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insult you..."  
"Shut up, Damien!" I sobbed. "Baby, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, come here. I'm sorry, baby." He tried to wrap his arms around me again. what part of NO did he not understand?  
"Stop...just...stop...." I wiped my eyes, shaking my head. "Sorry, Esme...come on...." Esme put a hand on my back, and we walked into my tattooing room.  
"How do you two know each other?" Damien asked, trying to get himself out of the doghouse.  
"We're just friends, Damien. Relax." I slammed the door in his face, turning to Esme. "Sorry about that..." I sighed. "I just...have kind of an issue with that..."  
"Oh, It's okay...I understand." She smiled gently.  
"Thanks. Now, where do you want this?" "On my shoulder blade. Is that ok?"  
"Yeah. Let me sketch something out, and then we'll get started." I turned around to my desk and quickly sketched a rainbow with Jasper's name in fancy lettering. "How about this?"  
"It's perfect! That's exactly how I wanted it!"  
I smiled, happy that I was successful. "Ok. Let's do it." She tantalizingly shrugged her shirt off, and then slowly peeled her bra strap off of her shoulder. I gulped, blushing. "Ready?" Her voice was slow and sexy. 'Please. Control yourself.' I thought down at myself. I looked over my shoulder to see Damien peering in at us, his arms crossed over his chest, a worried look on his face. I locked the door and threw the curtain across. No need for him to get worried about this. I was done with him. I didn't take insults or insult-like jokes well, and he knew it, yet he did it anyway. I felt Esme's hands go up my shirt, then. "Come on. Take your shirt off. I want to see your other tattoos~"  
I shuddered and took my shirt off. "ooh~ I like these. Come on. Let's do mine, then we can talk."  
I hurriedly got started on her tattoo, blushing all the while. When I was done, she scampered over to the mirror. "That's awesome!" She turned back to me, and let her other bra strap fall. "..Oops."  
That was it. I tackled her down to the bench and started kissing her. I felt her hand fist my hair, and moaned. Suddenly, she jerked up, her eyes wide. "what..?"  
"What are THESE?" She said, playing with my nipple piercings. "And THIS!" She mumured again, playing with my belly-button ring this time.  
I chuckled. "What do you think they are?"  
She smirked. "My new toys." she said, still flipping my belly-button ring. She ran her fingers down my chest. "You're so gorgeous..." she murmured, her hands ghosting over my back and chest. Over the french words that crossed my shoulders, Alice's name on my shoulder blade, the spiked vines that made a necklace, the cherry blossoms that shed on my chest, the stars that danced across my waist and abdomen, my self-proclaimed 'tramp-stamp' of stars and swirling lines that sat on my lower back. "So beautiful." I moaned when her hands were replaced with her mouth, and she started nibbling on my nipple. She moved down, then and unbuttoned my pants. When her hand brushed against me, I held my breath....She got closer, then, and I felt her hot breath on my member. I started to whimper, but caught myself. 'Don't act like a teenage GIRl, Carlisle...'  
"Don't stop yourself. I WANT to hear you."  
I blushed. She slipped my boxers down to my ankles. There was no going back, now...Not even if I wanted to.  
"You look neglected." She smirked and licked me. I shuddered in response. She stroked me for a bit, then slipped me in her mouth. "Nnnn....Esme...." She started then, at full force and speed, squeezing under where her mouth was. I screamed in pleasure, fisting her hair. "ESME!"  
"mmm~ Say my name again...."  
"Esme...Esme Esme Esme...."  
she took me in again, and hummed. I couldn't take it anymore. With a high-pitched cry of pleasure, I let go into her mouth. She licked me clean, then got up on top of me. I bucked my hips up, and we...well...had a little fun.  
We held each other, panting. Though it was amazing. I had a huge fear burning in the pit of my stomach. What if she left again? Would she be ashamed that she had done this? Would she run away again....?  
"Hey..." I felt her warm, gentle hand on my cheek, stroking the exact same way Damien did. "What's wrong? You're all tense. I don't like it..."  
"I...I'm just....worried you'll leave again. I'm afraid you'll leave as quickly as you came back...i...i don't want to do that again, Esme...."  
"Carlisle....that's what I'm worried about.....I'm afraid you'll do the same to me as I did to you."  
"No....i...I want to stay with you."  
She smiled. "Thank you."  
I heard the door burst open, and Damien raced in. "Carlisle! I heard screaming are you-" We were still lying naked on the tattooing bench. "Uh...Damien....I..I'm sorry, I didn't.... I...I think we're done, Damien...I can't take someone who insults me."  
"But that was a joke, Carlisle."  
"YOu know better..."  
"Alright..." With that Damien left, and I sighed.  
"That was...interesting..."  
Esme giggled. "Yeah, to say the least." 


	3. Chapter 3

That night. I felt someone watching me in my bed. Suddenly, I felt someone ripping my clothes off When I turned around, I just about peed myself.  
"Damien...what're you doing here?" I shook. He had never had that evil light in his eyes before.  
"I promised not to hurt you as long as we were together. We're not together anymore, and it's time for revenge. You hurt me so badly today."  
"W...What're you...?" Before I could even get my wits about me, Damien slapped me. He beat me ruthlessly for what seemed like hours. I just sat and took it all, like I had done all my life. After he was satisfied that I could hardly move, he threw me onto the bed again.  
"I remember you telling me I'm too big around, that I'd hurt you...and that you always felt safe with me because of how big and strong I was." He wrapped his hands around my sides, threatening to break my ribs with one wrong move. "Guess how THOSE plans back fired!" He flipped me over on my stomach, still keeping his hands threateningly on my ribs and thrust into me. Hard. My prediction was right; he was too big to fit into me, and I screamed in pain as he did. "Damien! Stop! STOP!" he hurt me so bad that night, pounding into me as hard as he could, forcing his width inside of me, and then he just...left me. Quivering, shaking, terrified.  
ESME'S POV

The next day, I decided to go to Carlisle's house and surprise him with a date. When I knocked on the door, I accidentally pushed it open.  
"...Carlisle?" This was already starting to be like a bad horror movie. I ran upstairs and glanced into Alice's room. Thankfully, she was unharmed. Although, when I went into Carlisle's room, every feeling of thankfulness escaped me, and rage overcame me. Carlisle lie in his blood-soaked bed, shaking and sobbing. He was curled tightly around himself, and the blankets were wrapped around him snuggly.  
"Carlisle...?" He merely whimpered. "What happened, sweetheart...?"  
He just sobbed heavier. "H...Help..."  
"Where are you bleeding from..?" I tried to feel along his back, since that's where it seemed to be from, but I couldn't find anything. I unwrapped the blanket from him, hearing his sobs almost double in volume, in fear. I gasped when I saw the bruises that mauled his flesh and the open wounds that contorted his white palor. But most of all...  
The blood.  
Blood stained his entire back, most likely from lying in it. As I looked down, I saw the source of the blood. "Oh my God! What HAPPENED to you?"  
"DAMIEN!" he sobbed.  
Daien. had done this. to him. I was going to kill that fucker. "D...Damien? I...I thought he'd promised never to hurt you..."  
"H...h...he...he s..said...th...that s...since...w...we weren't t..t...together....th...that...th...that..."He was really shaken up...I had to calm him down somehow, and this was DEFINATELY not the way. "Shhhhh, I understand what you're trying to say." I sighed. "Carlisle we have to get you to a hospita-"  
"NO! I....i....i m-mean."  
"Honey, please. you're going to...."  
"I...i...i'm...i'm going to what...?"  
"Honey, if we don't get you care, you're going to die." I pulled a blanket tightly around him and picked him up, wrapping him like a baby. "Come on, sweetheart. It'll be okay." Blood already started to soak through the blanket as I carried him to the car, buckled him in, and drove like a maniac to the hospital. He was so, so scared when I drove into the ER, and when I opened the door to get him out, I could hardly hold him he was shaking so bad. I took him in, and a doctor automatically took him from my arms and back to the examination rooms. I stayed in the waiting room, fearing of getting in the doctor's way. I heard screaming, and I could feel my face grow pale. Carlisle was screaming...were they hurting him, or was he justscared....? Neither was a good option, but I hoped for the second one...Maybe it was both, considering how badly he was hurt.  
After what seemed like an eternity, the doctor crashed through the doors. So, he was as clumsy as Carlisle himself....  
"He's really shaken up. Can you go back to see if you can calm him down?" I jumped up. "Is he okay? I...I mean, you just come out here and tell me to go back, you don't even tell me how he is?" I was talking at a mile a minute, and I knew it, but I didn't care.  
"He's going to be just fine. We got the...bleeding...stopped, and his wounds are all wrapped up. He's just going to be..." He chuckled without humor. "Really sore for a while."  
"okay. You said I should go back?"  
"Yeah. Please." I ran back and immediately found Carlisle. His torso was almost completely covered with bandages, his arms and legs partially covered, and a few pieces of gauze on his face and forehead, along with one BIG one around his neck. I couldn't see the worst of the damage, but that was probably best.... "Carlisle, sweetheart, calm down...it's okay..." I sat down beside him in bed, stroking his side. He was curled up into a tiny ball, and if I could just get him to uncurl a LITTLE BIT.... I pulled him into my lap, holding him as close as I could. He still cried and shook, but he calmed a little bit. I slouched so my head was right next to his, my chin resting on his shoulder. "Baby, It's okay. It's all over now. He won't hurt you again. It's over. It's over..." I gently stroked his stomach, just trying in any way to comfort him. He shivered, and I unfolded my hand over his stomach so that it would, i some small way, give him warmth. "W...why does it feel so good when you do that...?"  
I smiled softly and nuzzled him as gently as I could. "Because I love you." Even though he was...fucked up, to say the least, he hadn't shaved yet, of course, and the courseness of his...'whiskers' was...arousing, in some way. His smell was unbelievable, like soft pine, and an earthy scent, Very gentle and natural...Even though it was mixed with Damien's scent- strong and wild...like a stong floral smell with the air of the mountains and a...rainforest-like scent.  
"Esme....?"  
"Yes, sweetheart...?"  
"I love you, too."  
The next day, I spoiled Carlisle endlessly, making sure that his every whim was tended to. I could tell he was a bit embarrassed about it, but I didn't care. I was the cause of his incapacity. "Esme...It's not necessary for you to-"  
"I know, honey. Believe me, I know. But I WANT to." I ran my fingers through his hair and stroked down the side of his face to cup my hand over his cheek. "I like taking care of you." I kissed the bridge of his nose. "Now, how's the...pain...?"  
"I...I'm fine...." He blushed furiously. "You're not dizzy, are you? You lost a lot of blood last night..."  
He chuckled. "I...I'm fine." "Okay...let me know." I hurried back out to the kitchen, smelling dinner starting to burn. I truly felt bad for Carlisle. His mattress was soaked through with blood, and we had had to throw it out. He couldn't afford another mattress, so he had to sleep on the couch. I'd left Alice at home, but she had slept through the night, not even wondering where we were. I'd felt absolutely awful about that.  
I sighed, wondering what Carlisle was really feeling at the moment. Was he scared of ME because of last night, he could be scared of everyone after he's been raped, I'd been told by Damien himself a few days ago when he'd come to the salon.  
"Carlisle, baby?"  
He looked up at me as I wrapped my arms around his shoulders. "Hmmm?"  
"How are you feeling, really? Tell me the truth."  
He sighed. "I hurt all over, especially my ass." he chuckled lightly. "I want to flinch every time you touch me, I have to tell myself you WON'T rape me or molest me...I'm scared, Esme...But I push it down so Alice won't know, so she won't get worried." He smiled softly. "She wants me to take all my piercings out and let my hair gor out to it's natural color and become a doctor....That's...what I wanted to be, so many years ago when we first met...."  
"Jasper wants me to do the same thing, but to become a nurse."  
"...I'll do it, if you do it."  
I smiled softly. "I will. But you have to promise me ONE THING."  
"What's that?"  
"You won't lose the belly-button piercing. OR the nipple piercings."  
He chuckled. "Deal." 


	4. Epilogue

So, carlisle let his hair grow out so that he had his natural hair color, and he got his SCARLETT tattoo removed. He took every one of his piercings out, except for his belly-button ring, as Alice had practically ripped his nipples off trying to rip those piercings out...  
But, a few weeks after he had recovered, Carlisle proposed to me. We had a classical wedding, all early 1900's themed. Absolutely beautiful.  
Maybe what I had done to Carlisle was really best, since it had all ended out this way. Maybe it was all just a big twist of fate. Plus, Alice and Jasper were starting to develop a romance. Who knows what'll come next. 


End file.
